In the first months of 1959, Thor Agena rockets began launching the “Discoverer” satellites. At a rate of nearly one per month these payloads were unique because after they reentered the earth’s atmosphere, their parachutes were snagged by C-119 aircraft and they were recovered. In the 1960s and 1970s we space buffs went into our school libraries and read about the interesting scientific things that those Discoverers had done- indeed it was all scientific, it was all about exploration, it was all… A BIG FAT LIE!! In fact, those Discoverer stories were simply a CIA disinformation cover story to mask the launches of the top secret Corona spy satellites! All of that dreaming that we space buffs did about those launches was nothing more than a fiction, a fib, disinformation to make us tools in the cold war and fool the Soviets. All those hours spent reading were a waste… of course none of us found that out until we grew up. And now they wonder why we’re cynics! Well now you can get back at them, (whoever they are… or were) you can get your very own Dr. Zooch Discoverer Thor, build it and fly it in full view of the public and shout “There world, look at the top secret Corona rocket right here in this [insert: schoolyard, soccer field, football field, local park, back yard or secret location that not even the CIA knows about]!” Then again… you may want to build it in total secret, launch it in even more secret and then tell the neighbors that they saw nothing at all… perhaps it was swamp gas. Just think, in the 1960s this model would have gotten you a visit by guys in blue suits and dark glasses who carry metal brief cases, but today… it may get you a visit by guys in white coats or the local cops depending on how often and how loud the shout the above listed statement or where you launch it. We even pull a spoof on the CIA by attaching the Corona nosecone and Agena upper stage to a Thor with fins! You see the real Corona, or shall we say “Discoverer” vehicles were launched on finless Thors, so HA! Wrong booster! (Okay… so our rocket won’t fly without fins… but that’s beside the point…) Take that you disinformation feeders in the CIA! Here’s one on you!
This kit is our first Dr. Zooch “Easy Build.” Oh sure you still have to cut out and glue stuff, but it’s a great kit for a B.A.R. (Born Again Rocketeer) or for someone new to rocketry. It’s also a good kit for the advanced rocket geek. Although it is not a skill level one, it is not quite a level two, so we’ll call it a skill level 1.78469. It flies on any 18mm motor such as an “A” “B” or “C.” NO ENGINES ARE INCLUDED IN THIS KIT. When finished this semi-scale kit stands ~14.8 inches tall and is a high flyer. Recovery is by parachute but use of a C-119 aircraft to snag the rocket is not recommended since all C-119s were condemned about a decade ago.
COMMONLY ASKED QUESTIONS:
Q: How high does it fly?
A: It will go as high as [CENSORED]
Q: How fast does it go?
A: It goes a maximum of [CLASSIFIED] feet per second, which is [SECRET] miles per hour.
Q: What scale is it?
A: [CLASSIFIED] = [CENSORED]
Q: Can I write you a personal check?
A: NO Personal checks, please go bite your cyanide capsule.